Parents of James '14, New York, N.Y.
- Gary and Lorraine Lilley
Where did you attend high school? How does EHS compare to the high school you attended?
Gary and I went to traditional schools in the United Kingdom. Gary attended a boys’ school in Belfast, and I attended a girls’ school in London. We both have strong memories of a traditional schooling, where it was very much the teacher lecturing at the front of the class and writing on the blackboard. On our tour of Episcopal, we were struck by the classroom structure – the U- shaped desk formation – so the teacher and children could really interact as a group. You could see how comfortable the kids were in intellectual exchanges with their teachers. However, the strongest difference in the approach to teaching is being taught how to think about the subject – to ask questions and surmise the answers – not teaching to just pass an exam as was the case for us.
Why did you decide to consider a boarding school for James ’14?
We looked at day schools in New York City and several boarding schools along the East Coast. There were many factors that we took into account. For example, all the city schools that James liked involved taking transportation, such as the subway or a bus, which would have taken over an hour of time each day, that he now uses for sports, the arts, or studying. James was also ready for the next adventure and was really mature enough to want to go away to school. For us as parents, having all his new school friends together in one place was also really appealing. We don’t have to worry about unsupervised house parties and wondering how he is getting home. The boarding schools want students who are willing to try new things and James was ready for that, and the facilities and opportunities offered at a boarding school could not be matched by the day schools.
Why did you choose to send James to EHS?
Location was key. Being so close to Washington, D.C., and having access to the city as a resource was important for a child who has grown up in New York City. With that come several transportation options for him and for us – the plane, train, or Boltbus (which is great and inexpensive for those longer breaks)! He could easily get home if he wanted to or when we wanted to see him. Using Washington and the surrounding area as a classroom is something unique Episcopal offers compared to other coed boarding schools.
A 100% boarding school with a community of kids who live together is very reassuring, and there is no disconnect between day and boarding children. Having 90 percent of the faculty living on campus and really knowing your child is fantastic.
When we visited Episcopal during the application process, the mutual respect between faculty and students was palpable. There was a lot of laughter; there was a banter between them; and you could see how much the faculty cared and put their enthusiasm into the classes. During his first year, there were many occasions during which faculty went above and beyond to help James and ensure that he had a successful year.
James felt comfortable at EHS from the beginning. The Honor Code is a part of all aspects of EHS school life. He loved that everyone would leave their backpacks outside of the buildings without worrying about anything being taken from them. Having good ethical principals and integrity is key and those skills will be used throughout his life, not just at school.
How has the decision to send James to boarding school affected his relationship with you?
Our relationship has always been good, but boys can be boys, and as a parent you get tired of nagging about homework, organization, picking up laundry, getting off the computer, etc. Since so many of these issues are dealt with at school through study period, dorm life, and sensibly-controlled access to social networking sites (during study period for example), a lot of that stress disappears. We are always so happy to see each other on breaks and when we visit him at school. He appreciates home more, too! Because of access to the Internet and the use of cell phone/texting/BBM, we can communicate easily with each other.
How has EHS impacted James’ life?
He has enjoyed meeting lots of new students from all over the States and different countries and developing those friendships. He has enjoyed the classes and the opportunities to try new sports, such as wrestling and lacrosse, as well as learning the guitar. I think that dorm life has really helped James mature, and he has learned how to balance time, energy, socializing, studying, eating and sleeping – the latter two being especially important for a teenage boy! He is looking forward to his sophomore year.
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